WOW!!!

Wow! I can't believe it! After what I have been going through the last 2 weeks this is what I really needed! A 7 lb weight loss in a week!!! Yes, I know most of it is water weight but I am ecstatic for the moment! I can't wait to see what next mondays weigh-in will be!!! I have been going through a rough patch in my life, on thursday would have been my 4 year anniversary with my boyfriend Andrew, but we have split up and its been the toughest time in my life! Its hard to just change everything (new apartment, new everything) when you spend 4 years building a life with someone! I could go on and on about that but I am trying to not think about that because I find myself going nuts! It's too much to take on at the moment and I am sick of going back and fourth from being happy to upset which is only natural. BUT, for right now I am going to say I am proud of myself and I can't believe this time I am actually doing it! I am going to be the person I always wanted to be and have the fun I deserve! I am soo proud of myself!

Eating good, working out and DOIN GREAT!!!!!

I am doing great so far in this long journey. This is the one and only time in my life where I feel like I really want it bad enough to change it. I am eating amazingly great, following points and working out 5x a week. I have found myself almost making excuses not to work out because of my school schedule being so rough this week but realized its a half hour of circuit training, I can deal with it-and I have! I will not weigh myself until Monday because I find that if I weigh myself every day, I obsess over it and I tend to fall off the bandwagon because I am not seeing change fast enough! I wanted to share awesome foods that I found when searching for low point options. They have weight watchers foods (and yes-sometimes they can get expensive)- but some products are definitely worth it. First, I found WW Plain Bagels at 2 pts for an entire normal sized bagel! And they are delish! Of course, I would rather not have my bagel plain, so I also bought the individual containers of WW Creme Cheese at 1 pt each. You get 8 in a package and it was decently priced. In my city, the bulk stores seem to have the best deals on "healthy foods". Ive also been eating Original Boca Burgers like crazy! They are sooo yummy and at only 1 pt per burger, guilt-free!!! Ketchup is 0 pts if used moderately, so I just put a tiny tiny bit on there, and maybe some onions (o pts) and it fills me up pretty quickly. I was very surprised. I was buying these every 2 days because there are only 4 in a box, so I ended up going to the bulk grocery store and I found a big box with 16 burgers. I have also been eating WW Peanut Butter Cookies (1 pt ea) and those are really great too but a little pricey. The main reason I picked those out of the other WW "snacks" is because the muffins, and brownies ect. only came with 3-5 a box. These cookies actually have 9 per box so I thought it was a better deal for the amount of money I spent. Ive also been eating 100 calorie yogurts (2 pts ea), WW Ice Cream Bars (2 pts ea), and salads as well! Another great find was Special K Cereals. They have plenty of different flavors to choose from but my favorite is the Blueberry. 3/4 cup of this cereal with a 1/2 cup of skim milk is only 2 pts! I also bought the Kellogg's Snack crackers (24 crackers=2 pts). I eat these crackers with laughing cow cheese wedges or even spinach dip (in moderation at 1 pt for 2 TBSP)! I hope to find more great snacks and meals and I am sure I will the further I get into this kick I'm on! Ill update more later:-) Any ideas on other foods and points , let me know:-)

In Control and loving every minute of it!!!

Well I am finally on my way. I was off to a slow and rough start but everything is going to work out because I am going to make it work out! I have been doing weight watchers for the past week and have been really sticking to eating better in general and its really paying off. Working out is just an added bonus and I really need to thank my girls for getting me through it. My cousin started weight watchers and I jumped on it with her and we are doing it together, it feels great! My life long friend Carri, joined Curves about a year ago and in 7 months lost 60+ lbs and she looks amazing! She has been a big inspiration though all of this. She is the one that pushed me to start curves. Well I started Curves in Jan of 2009 and have been sticking with it off and on. She lives about 30 minutes away and goes to a different curves. Well after having friends join with me and leave me hanging as far as them not wanting to work out, I stopped going. Well my girl Carri is moving here and she is going to the same curves now so I finally have a workout buddy I can depend on! I started my weight loss journey at a shocking 278 lbs. Yes, that hurt my insides just typing that number but its time I stopped lying to myself, face the facts, and do something about it. I went to my first curves workout today in a long time and got on the scale and I am 264 lbs. Its about the same as I was when I started this blog, but I know for sure that I had to have gained a lot of that back when I was falling off the bandwagon and I am proud to say that a with a little hard work I took it back off. I have set mini-goals for myself which seems to me giving me even more inspiration then before. What I do is I have "dates of importance" in my life. Some holidays, some birthdays, and other special times coming up that are my mini-goal dates. This gives me great inspiration because I am not going to go through another summer couped up in my house every day because of the way I look. I remember 7 months ago, saying to myself "Kel-by Halloween of this year you are going to look great, don't let yourself fail" well every day that got closer I would put off eating healthy and exercise and when Halloween came around this year, I was still the same way I was 7 months ago. It seemed like so much time away, but in reality that was a pretty quick 7 months. I will not do this again, I have disappointed myself so many times and my unhealthy weight and self confidence is destroying the fun awesome person I used to be and really am inside here somewhere. I am going to get it back and hopefully someone in my situation will stumble across my blog and see that I did , so can they. I always sit on the Internet and look through peoples weight loss stories just trying to find someone that can give me inspiration and someone that I can relate to, and I want to be that person for some many others. Here goes nothing (pictures to follow:-) )

getting back on the bandwagon:-)

Well, I have been extremely busy the last few weeks and its obvious because I haven't come on here to give any updates. Well I am officially back on the weight loss bandwagon. I have been trying to eat well and get as much exercise as I can and I have managed to maintain my weight (no loss or gain). I am happy about that. In the meantime, I found a website that has actually been a lifesaver to me the past few weeks. I use it as a real motivational tool. Not saying you should dream to be skinny, but it gives you an idea of what you will look like if you work really hard and I put the picture up where I see it everyday and its a real eye opener.

You can put your face on your body type, and change the weight as needed. I had a pic up of my weight now and I look like and then this, and its amazingly helpful! Its called mvm.com. I cant wait to take a real pic next to it once I lose the weight to see if it really looks the same:-) We will see! I also want to start putting up some of the things I have been eating and some of my tricks for losing weight. If anyone has any suggestions or ways they have tried that have worked, let me know! Id love to hear them and try some of them out. As far as foods, I am a real picky eater, and it has to be semi-simple for me to make or forget about it:-) I love baking and cooking but if there are more than 15 ingredients, I get a little annoyed lol-but I am willing to try anything once. Hope your all doing well!!!

falling off the bandwagon, but trying to get back on:-/

Its been a while since my last post and I am trying to get better at updating. Classes started for this semester which has kept me pretty busy so far. I will admit I haven't worked out in a few days and I have fallen back into some of my old eating habits. I don't know why this is so hard for me. Everyday I look in the mirror I am more and more disgusted with myself and just when it seems like I have found my "ah-ha moment" , I forget it about it the next day. What is wrong with me? Where the hell is my motivation? I really though I found my breaking point to finally do something but lost it again like always. Maybe my breaking point will be having enough breaking points:-) Maybe! Well I shouldn't be too hard on myself, all though I have not lost any weight since starting to work out again, I haven't gained any back that I have lost since Jan. so I should be proud of that. All I can do is keep trucking away, but I desperately need some motivation. To my 2 followers, thank you:-) If you see this post and would be willing to share your "breaking points" and/or any motivation tips, I'm all ears. And that goes to anyone that may randomly stumble across my blog which I hope that actually happens:-)

Not losing much...

Well I have only lost 2 lbs since last week which is better than nothing so I really shouldn't be complaining. The good thing about it is that this past January I started Curves and was working out regularly and my starting weight then was 278 lbs. So far I have actually lost 14 lbs which I should be proud that since then I havent gained anything back. Hopefully I can keep building momentum as I go. I have been doing really good with eating right. If I do have something to eat that is "bad", I have the minimal amount so I am not depriving myself. This seems to be working out well. Even though these past couple weeks have been rough as far as being sick, I am doing the best I can to try to get some sort of exercise. Example- 2 days ago I was too sick to get out of the house (I have to be near a bathroom and I refuse to Puke in public (sorry people)), so for my "workout" I rearranged our bedroom. Just moving the furniture in there was enough. Considering I moved a entertainment center with the TV still on because it was too heavy to take off. It was hilarious! It almost fell on top of me like the first 5 times I tried, finally I gave up and just started dragging it to the other side of the room. It took about 1 hour to move the furniture and I was really working up a sweat. My muscles were very sore the next day which ironically made me feel great! So I guess that's my suggestion for the excuse that "I cant workout because I am too sick". Most people feel more comfortable in their own private space so do what you can around the house. If you have stairs, climb those:-) Well that's it for now.. I am really excited about this blog and I hope I can meet many other people that are going through the same experiences as I am :-) GOOD LUCK TO ALL OF YOU!!!

Not in the best shape...(LITERALLY)

Well that can be taken many ways I suppose..but lately I've been having very bad luck. First I sprained my wrist, still not sure how I did that. I can tell you I was in a pretty good amount of pain the first few days now I am slowly getting better, or getting used to it. Next, I get some sort of flu (not sure yet) that is giving me a good amount of abdominal pain, along with other not-so-fun things I really cant mention here (wouldn't want to gross anyone out). Then today on top of all that, I was cooking lunch for Andrew (my boyfriend) and burned the eff out of my hand. So there it is. That's how my last week has been. With this "flu" type thing, I haven't been able to get to my gym so instead of just not doing anything I have been on my treadmill every day, which helps. Still on my healthy eating kick. Trying to eat as much fruit as I can, which has been going well. I am proud that despite all of my bad luck, I am able to stay on track and do anything I am able to without giving up completely. Its shown me that I have come a long much needed way lol. So since I was unable to get weighed this past Monday, I will be at the gym tomorrow and give an update on if I have lost or gained (hopefully lost). We will see! Later!

Excuses....

I thought I would make a list of my most frequent excuses not to workout :-( because I actually caught myself yesterday doing that exact thing........

*I don't have the time! (My Curves workout is only 30 minutes, that's bull* )

*My cars not working (which it isn't at the moment, but I have a bike and a moped to get there)

*I'm too tired (this is a popular one, but working out gives me more energy)

*I really don't have the time to get there ( I have a treadmill at home... another bull*)

*I have no one to workout with (I found that relying on someone has not helped so much in the past, the person loses drive and then causes me to lose my drive.. you can only depend on yourself)

These are just a few of the lame excuses I have used. Now every time I want to make another one, I will look on here and it will probably be on my list...

The Curves Workout

I promised I would post some information about Curves Health Clubs for Women. In my city we have at least 4 locations and more are coming all the time. There is pretty much a location in any part of the city. I do know that when you are a Curves member you can get travel passes to workout at any other curves so this helps if you do a lot of traveling or want to work out with a friend that lives farther away. Curves is a circuit training workout with machines placed in a circle. You are on a machine for 30 seconds, then switch to the next so you are constantly moving. Each machine works specific parts of your body. In between each machine there are recovery stations where you keep your heart rate up by either jogging in place on them or whatever you want (some women decide to dance, its hilarious). I go around the circuit two times each time I go, but you can go however many times you want. Once I start losing more weight I will be going around 3 times. The other members there are very encouraging, and the employees are as well. You pick days each month to get weighed and measured which definitely does help you keep track of your success. Every curves is different so each place has there own fun style. Our Curves has games we play each day to win awesome prizes, books to borrow, Raffles...something everyday. I absolutely love it there! And the best part is that I feel comfortable being around only women because I do not have to worry about feeling self conscious when I work out, which has definitely stopped me in the past from completing affective workouts. Tge website is www.curves.com. Check it out! Right now they are having a special for the rest of the summer free if you sign up now. (That may not be at every Curves..but most Ive seen are having this promotion). Majority of the locations usually let you try the workout out for a week or two just to see if its something you want to pursue. The fees are minimal and its worth it to take control of your life back.

How I plan to do it.....

I have spent a little time thinking about how I am going to take the weight off. As many of you know, its very hard to continue on with healthy eating practices with a partner that can eat whatever they want. My boyfriend is that way, and all though he means well- he does not do a good job of keeping that yucky food away from me. Last night he offered me pizza :-(. I resisted but it gets hard when he does that more than once throughout a day. He is not by any means fat but he does have a little belly but you could never tell under his clothes and hes comfortable that way. I am not about to force my wanting to change my lifestyle on him. That wouldn't be fair. But I did however, ask him to help me out and not bring me home a soda, and not offer me fast food. He said he would do anything to help so that's where we are at. I believe that your spouse or just the people you live with is one of the most important aspects in being successful in anything. All though no one can make you do something, its ultimately your decision- I know how big of an impact they can have. Other resources I have is a Curves Membership. I have been going to one of the local Curves since January of this year. I have lost 14 lbs but no more than that. Its a great place to go workout and the people there are great. Many people have the idea that Curves is for older women, yes it is! ITS FOR ANY WOMEN!!! Our Curves has women of all age groups from 18-75 believe it or not. I love it there and I just recently got back in my routine of going each morning. Its a 30 minute workout, but trust me- if you put in something there, you will definitely get it back. The people that go there and hardly try or push themselves, they are the ones that do not lose. I managed to lose a little bit of weight just by going there 3x a week for I believe it was a month straight. I would say that's pretty good. Anyone that is interested in Curves I will post a blog with more information on what it is but I highly suggest just going to the website or even visiting one in your area. They are very friendly people and its very easy to join... As far as more resources, I also have a new Trek Bike that my boyfriend got for me. Its pink, my favorite color (which you will continue to learn throughout my blogs I'm sure).

I have used it probably 3 times. This saddens me:-( There is no reason why I cant take a half hour ride each morning for some additional excercise. Better yet, I could always ride my bike to Curves which for me is about 2 miles away, not far. Good Ideas. I also have a Nordic Trac Treadmill which is collecting dust at the moment. All these "tools" I have had that I haven't used, but I will be....

Why I want to lose this weight.....

I am pretty much sick of being utterly, ridiculously, sickly critical of myself. I am sick of starting a diet and somehow failing again and again and again. I am sick of complaining about how chubby I have gotten. I am sick of missing out on fun summer activities because I do not want people to see me in a swim suit. I am sick of finding outfits to cover up the "problem areas" I have. I am sick of not being able to find my size in a shirt I want, or having to look in the back of the rack for my size. I am sick of wearing black. I am sick of looking this way and its finally time I do something about it. A little more information on me... I am 24 years old, as you already know and I am about 5'10". SO, I am not a petite gal. Growing up I was always very slender, and had no problems with my weight. I have grown into an emotional eater. I get bored a lot, and that is probably my biggest excuse (feels good to admit that finally:-) ). I was a decent size through high school (all though I thought I was huge) looking back, Id kill to be that size again. I graduated high school and BAM!!!! Packed on the lbs. Most of it was when I met my boyfriend of currently 4 years. We spent every second together, mostly watching movies and eating out (THE ENEMY-FAST FOOD). From there I put on around 80 lbs. I was around 200 lbs when I met him, which was not skinny but better than I am now. For my body type, at 180lbs, I look decent. I am confident at that weight, and I am not about to lose too much and have my bones stick out. I don't find that attractive and my boyfriend certainly doesn't. If I get back down to that weight, and I feel I need to lose more, than I will certainly try but I am not going for a unrealistic goal. Back to my life.. :-) I am the type of person who has begun to avoid friends or family functions for fear that people will be shocked at how big Ive become. I have always been the girl with the pretty face and skinny legs. Well my face may be still awesome but my legs sure as hell arn't skinny anymore. Neither is my mid section. So I have lost quite a few friends over the last few years, and have estranged relationships with many of my close cousins that were some of my closest friends because of it. Sad huh? While all my friends are out going to bars, parties or camping, boating ect.. I am home doing mostly nothing making countless excuses why I can't be at these places. I have NEVER been the person to stay at home every weekend. I was always the life of the party, and had the best times! I want that again. Don't get me wrong, I am content being at home with Andrew, but I wanna have time with my girlfriends again. Not only that but I want to be able to go to the lake with my boyfriend and go swimming without having to wear shorts, tank top and a shirt :-). I want to accept the invitation when our friends ask us to go boating, and not say no because I am afraid of being the biggest one there. Many of my friends have given up on getting me out and before I would act like I didn't care but now, I am realizing what I have done. I am 24 and these are suppose to be the best years of my life and I am wasting them away on these extra lbs. Well not anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO WAY!!!!